Ismail Kamdar

Ismail Kamdar is the Founder of Islamic Self Help and Izzah Academy, author of over a dozen books, and the operations manager of Yaqeen Institute.
Ismail Kamdar is the Founder of Islamic Self Help and Izzah Academy, author of over a dozen books, and the operations manager of Yaqeen Institute.
The Benefits of Solitude

The Benefits of Solitude

“Remembering Allah verbally is good, but contemplating about the blessings of Allah is the best act of worship.”

Umar Ibn Abdul Aziz

In an always connected world, we are never truly alone. Through our phones and social media, we never give ourselves enough time to think, reflect, or even engage in quality worship. Making time to be alone and spending that time in a way that is pleasing to Allah is an integral part of purifying the soul. It is in solitude that we develop our best ideas, find solutions to our problems, unlock deeper understandings of our scriptures, and benefit from quality alone time with Allah. Solitude is therefore crucial for success in every aspect of our life.

The Prophet ﷺ received the first revelation in the cave of Hira. He had already been there for a few days, and it was his habit to isolate himself from society for a few days to contemplate and figure out solutions to the problems facing his community. Spending time alone to think deeply or to worship Allah is a cherish Sunnah that we need to revive in our times. It has a rich history and there are many great examples of this throughout Muslim history.

When Ibn Taymiyyah was thrown in prison, he cherished the idea that it would be a khalwa (solitude) with Allah. He used that time to worship Allah, reflect, and to write his books. When Ibn al-Haytham was placed under house arrest, he used that time to think and experiment and ended up figuring out the science of optics. When Imam al-Ghazali felt that he was getting too popular and was worried that it would affect his intentions, he disappeared from society to focus on purifying his soul. There are many other examples like this showing that many of the great all practised solitude in different ways at different points in their lives.

A Balanced Approach

Solitude is something built into our religion, but Islam also warns us against complete isolation. A believer must find balance between making time to sit alone and worship Allah, and time to serve the community and take care of the family. Complete isolation is unnatural and derives one of the benefits of being part of the ummah. Solitary confinement is a punishment for a reason, and one should not put oneself into voluntary confinement. The key is to make time for oneself, while still being part of society.

The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “The believer who mixes with people and is patient with their harm has a greater reward than the believer who does not mix with people, nor is patient with their harm.”

Ibn Majah 4032

We must keep this hadith in mind when seeking solitude. Solitude should not interfere with our family and communal duties; it should supplement and enhance it. The purpose of making time for oneself in Islam is primarily to worship Allah. Every Muslim should make time to worship Allah in private, the ideal time is during the Last Third of the night but even at any other time it is beneficial and a great deed. There are other usages of solitude as well which includes deep thinking, contemplation, meditation, and problem solving. It is when we take time to sit alone and think deeply that we develop our best ideas and solutions to our problems.

The benefits of solitude are many, but for the sake of brevity I will just list the primary benefits here:

  1. Quality sincere worship of Allah
  2. Focused time to do deep work or think deeply
  3. Potential of solving complex problems
  4. Potential to overcome dark thoughts and work through them
  5. An opportunity to unlock deeper understandings of Islamic scripture
  6. A chance to reset the mind and take a break from pressures of society

These benefits alone should make solitude something we all should carve time out for regularly.

How to maximize your alone time

Alone time works best when it is structured, and you have a process. If you block out time to be alone but do not plan how you will use that time, then you may end up wasting it with entertainment, dark thoughts, or even sinful deeds. To avoid this, alone time must be planned and structured. Here are some ways to use this time productively.

Engage in extra acts of worship – Utilize a portion of your alone time to worship Allah. This gives you some quality worship that is free from any wrong intentions. Every Muslim should have secret good deeds that only Allah knows about. Use this time to recite Quran, pray Salah, make dua, and engage in zikr and istighfār. Maming time daily for private worship is a must for every believer.

Have a clear agenda of topics to focus on – When sitting down to think, have a clear agenda. Do not allow your mind to wonder freely from topic to topic. Go in with specific topics to reflect on or problems to solve. Focus on those topics and avoid any topics that distract you from your goals.

Create a beautiful environment for solitude – Build for yourself an ideal environment for deep thinking. How this environment looks will differ from person to person. The goal is to have a place you can go to that is free from distraction, and that inspires you to think deeply and positively. Many people benefit from being out in nature for their alone time. Others prefer a small room with some comfy features. Find what works for you and set up your thinking space.

Give yourself a time limit – Alone time should not override your duties. You still need to work, care for your family, and serve your community. To ensure that your thinking time does not violate the rights of others, give yourself a strict time limit. As soon as the time is over, move on to the next priority on your to-do list.

Obstacles to solitude

There are many reasons why people are unable to find time for themselves today. For some, life is too busy, and they do not view it as a priority. For others, they have surrounded themselves with so many distractions (media, social media, technology) that they are never truly alone with their thoughts. A big one today though is that many people are afraid of their own thoughts.

Everybody has dark thoughts lurking deep in their minds. For many people, they avoid these thoughts by distracting themselves constantly from thinking and being alone. Because of this, they never confront these thoughts or work through them. To unlock deeper parts of our brain, we need to work through whatever is clouding our minds. This means making time to face our dark thoughts, work through them, resolve them, and discover deeper parts of ourselves. Do not be afraid to face the darkness within. It is better to recognize it, face it, and overcome it internally, than to ignore it as it festers and grows uncontrollably.

Another common obstacle to solitude are our gadgets. We are constantly connected with the rest of the world through the internet. Because of this, we are never truly alone. To overcome this, when blocking out time to be alone, switch off your devices and detox from the online world. Let your family or co-workers know that you cannot be disturbed for the assigned time unless it is an emergency and close all unnecessary channels of communication. This will give you the focused alone time you need to get things done.

Getting Started

For some people, making time to be alone may be very new. It is, however, one of the best habits you can learn at any point in life. Making time daily to worship Allah in private and to think deeply is a great way to enhance the quality of your life. Get started today by setting a time, choosing your environment, and deciding on a topic to reflect on. Start small and build a consistent habit of deep reflection in solitude. Remember that small consistent good deeds are most valuable in the long run.

The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “Take up good deeds only as much as you are able, for the best deeds are those done regularly even if they are few.”

Ibn Majah 4240

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Posted by Ismail Kamdar in Inner Peace, Life Hacks, Positive Thinking
Dealing With Procrastination

Dealing With Procrastination

Procrastination is the single most common word I hear whenever I bring up the topic of Time Management. “I’m a procrastinator” is the common reply people give me for why they are unable to meet deadlines or organize themselves well. Procrastination is treated like a fact of life, something inherit that can’t be changed or overcome, but this is nothing more than deceiving ourselves.

Procrastination is a habit, and a terrible habit too. However, like all other bad habits it can be overcome with strong will power, commitment and a reason to succeed.

The ability to change a bad habit and replace it with a good one is something every human has the ability to do, all we really need is motivation, and that is what I hope this chapter serves as, motivation to finally let it go.

In order to overcome procrastination, it is important that we understand its roots and causes. There are four main reasons why people procrastinate:

1. Lack of goals or vision

This has already been covered in details in a previous chapter. Goals are our motivation to go the distance and make something of our lives. Goals serve to motivate us, inspire us and give us a reason to face each day with renewed energy.

If someone lacks goals, they see no reason to commit to something, to do a good job or even to get it done on time. Life for such people is just a series of obstacles to survive with minimum effort, and so they leave every task for last minute and don’t really focus on quality either.

The first step to overcoming procrastination is to have goals to work towards. This will motivate you to organize your life in such a way that these goals are accomplished over time.

2. Deception

Shaytaan uses the trick of deception to get people to procrastinate, especially when it comes to righteousness and repentance. The common phrase “I’ll repent when I get older,” is a classic example of deceptive procrastination. We fool ourselves into thinking we have plenty of time to do something in the future.

In the case of repentance, procrastination is deadly and can cause great harm to one’s life in this world and especially in the Afterlife. Yet we apply this same mentality to other aspects of our lives. We think we have plenty of time to write that assignment, submit that report, prepare that class or prepare the meeting notes, until we realize that we don’t.

Then the rush is on, with great anxiety, fear and worry we rush to complete something at the last minute and the result is poor shoddy quality work, and a lot of unneeded stress.

The key here is to understand the deception of “later”. As Muslims we are taught to never leave anything for the future without saying “inshaa Allah” (If Allah Wills).


وَلَا تَقُولَنَّ لِشَيْءٍ إِنِّي فَاعِلٌ ذَٰلِكَ غَدًا

إِلَّا أَنْ يَشَاءَ اللَّهُ

“And do not say about anything that I will do it tomorrow without saying if Allah wills,”
(Surah Al-Kahf 18:23-24)

This statement “inshaa Allah” is meant to be a reminder to us that the future is in Allah’s control so we shouldn’t delay anything that can be done today.

We don’t know what tomorrow has in store for us, so let us lift the veil from our eyes and realize that every moment lost through procrastination is wasted time that you can never get back for the rest of your life. The time for action is now, not tomorrow.

3. Perfectionism

Another cause of procrastination is perfectionism. This is the one thing that caused me to procrastinate in launching my writing career. I always wanted to be an author and to spend my days writing books.

I had many ideas and wrote many outlines, summaries and first chapters. However, I found myself unable to move forward beyond that due to my desire for my writing to be perfect.

I would look at my first draft, full of mistakes and in major need of editing, and think to myself that nobody is going to read this. I would end up putting it away frustrated and moving on to attempt my next project. Perfectionism stood in the way of writing or completing any important project.

One day I finally realized that my chain of thought was ridiculous. I am a human being, and the writings of human beings are never perfect. First drafts, in general, are always a mess. This is why we edit, and hire editors, and even have to publish revised editions.

I realized that if I want to have a career in writing, I need to let go of my desire to be perfect and just write. Write whatever comes to mind, I can always edit, rephrase, delete or expand upon it later. Once I realized this, the procrastination ended and the writings began to flow.

You too may have a goal that you have been putting off because it isn’t perfect. The only way forward is to realize that it never will be perfect. It is a human project and being human means embracing imperfection. It doesn’t need to be perfect, it just needs to be your best effort. So let go of your desire for perfection and just focus on doing your best.

John Perry, the author of The Art of Procrastination, offers some valuable insight into how to overcome this problem:

You have to get into the habit of forcing yourself to analyse, at the time you accept a task, the costs and benefits of doing a less-than-perfect job. You must ask yourself some questions: How useful would a perfect job be here? How much more useful would it be than a merely adequate job…and you got to ask yourself: What is the probability that I will really do anything like a remotely perfect job on this? And: What difference will it make to me, and to others, whether I do or not?

Often the answer will be that a less-than-perfect job will be just fine, and moreover it’s all I am ever going to do anyway. So I give myself permission to do a less-than-perfect job now, rather than waiting until the task is overdue. Which means I may as well do it now. (Or at least start tomorrow)[1]

4. Instant Gratification

The fourth major cause of procrastination is the fact that many of us are programmed mentally to focus on instant gratification. The modern advertising industry thrives on instant gratification. From the time a child is able to understand, he is taught to prefer immediate delights over long-term deals. We grow up with this mentality and it has a detrimental effect on every aspect of our lives.

As Muslims, many fall into major sins like fornication because of focusing on instant gratification, instead of the long-term deal of marriage and the responsibilities that come with it. Likewise, people are looking for the instant fix, instant high, get rich quick schemes and even shortcuts to Paradise and Caliphate.

This mentality crosses over into our time management too. We may have goals and dreams, but the instant gratification of that next chat, next funny video, and next snack break gets in the way and causes us to procrastinate and often give up on anything that requires long-term effort.

This mentality is completely unislamic and destructive. The state of the ummah today is proof of this, on one hand the violent extremists seek shortcuts to Paradise, and on the other side the average Muslim prefers instantly satisfying his desires over working toward righteousness.

Islamic teachings emphasize the concept of Sabr which translates into many concepts like patience, persistence, self-restraint and consistency. All of these indicate long-term effort and long-term success. The idea of quick methods to success in this world or the Afterlife is a deception, unrealistic and unislamic.

Overcoming this barrier requires a shift in how we think and view the world. We need to understand that success, be it worldly or Afterworldly, can only be attained through long-term hard work. There is no shortcut to fixing the problems of the Middle East, just like there is no shortcut to training your soul or attaining financial success. If you want something, you need to be ready to commit to it long-term.

I will speak more about the concept of Sabr and its role in time management in a future chapter. The purpose here was to help us understand why we procrastinate. It is only when we understand why we have bad habits that we are able to move on and overcome them.

Positive Procrastination

As anti-procrastination as I may sound, I too procrastinate when it is beneficial. Procrastination, when planned, can actually be a very beneficial time management skill. Positive procrastination means to put things off until the right time to do it.

For example, if I am tired and it is after work hours, I choose to rest and have fun and put off any tasks until the next day. If it is work hours, and I am feeling drained, I take a short break and do something fun before getting back to work.

Some people might think I am procrastinating. After all, why put off until tomorrow what you can do today? My reply to that is, “Because I know I will do a better job at it tomorrow than if I do it now,”

If you have very high goals and aspirations, it is not possible to do everything in one day, one week, one month, one year or even one decade. You will have to plan and prioritise, and that means procrastinating the things you don’t need to do yet, in order to make time for the things you need to do now.

Sometimes the thing you need to do later is hard work and what you need to do right now is take a vacation. You shouldn’t feel guilty about that, it is in your best interest to take that vacation, recharge your body and mind and return revitalized ready to do a much better job than you would have done had you not taken the vacation.

This form of procrastination is good, as it is part of prioritizing and planning, and so it should be done without any feeling of guilt. Anything that benefits you in the long run is a good thing, even if that thing is a form of procrastination.

Just get started

So you have a goal, you know you shouldn’t procrastinate, you have a plan but you haven’t committed to it yet. Something is holding you back. Your mind is filling with excuses. If this is the case then you need to look yourself in the mirror and firmly remind yourself that there is no benefit in delaying anything good.

Every day wasted can never be returned. Why waste this precious resource? What do you have to lose if get started today on changing your lifestyle and focusing on your goals?

Think about your life in ten or twenty years’ time and where you would like to be then, and realize that if you want that, you need to start working towards it today. Delaying is not going to get you anywhere.

Remember that this whole drama is playing out in your mind and you control what you focus on and which thoughts you act on. So put aside the excuses, take control of your time and start changing.

“He who counts tomorrow as part of his life does not recognize death as it should be merited. How many days are to come but he will not be there! How many wishes he has for the days to come that he will not get! If you comprehend the terms of life and the speed with which it flees, then you will detest your desires and wishes,” Awn Ibn Abdullah[2]

New Habits – New Beginnings

Time management is a matter of replacing bad habits with good habits. We all have some habits that waste time or cause delays. Procrastination was focused on because it is the most common, but there are many others like laziness, oversleeping, overeating, and excessive socializing. Interestingly, the classical scholars referred to these things as corrupters of the heart.

Not only do they waste our time but they eat away at our souls and lead us down the part of wastage of other resources too like wealth and knowledge. If you are committed to time management then you need to be ready to change many habits over time.

The key to changing a habit is the following formula:

1. Identify bad habit
2. Identify good habit to replace it
3. Start replacing the bad habit with the good one today
4. Be consistent until the new habit is truly a habit (average 30 days)
5. After that, it gets easier, so you can move on to focus on changing another habit.

Changing habits requires commitment and Sabr, but they serve only to benefit you and you have nothing to lose when replacing a bad habit with a good one.

With regards to time management, here are some key habits that you need to develop:

1. Planning

Planning is part of the lifestyle of every successful person in history. Just look at how well-planned the Hijrah of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was, how well Khalid Ibn Waleed prepared his armies for their battles, and the amount of planning that went into writing the major Islamic works throughout history.

Nothing worthwhile can be accomplished without adequate planning, and this makes planning a crucial habit to develop. Whether it is making a long-term plan to accomplish a goal, planning your year, month, week, day, lecture, meeting or class. This habit goes a long way in helping manage our time and make the best out of our lives.

2. Chunking

One of the causes of procrastination is that we look at things as huge piles of work that need to get done. However, any large task can be cut down to digestible chunks. This itself requires some planning, but also requires consistent small effort, yet it is a habit that save a lot of time.

For example: Just say you need to prepare 100 questions for an exam paper as a school teacher. You have 10 days to prepare it. Many people choose to spend the first few days complaining that the deadline is too short, then a few more days stressing over the deadline, before sitting down the night before to rush and prepare all 100 questions. This system makes no sense at all.

Why not prepare 10 questions a day? That won’t take much time, is not stressful at all and you will be completed on time with much better quality questions as you took the time to prepare each question carefully.

This concept can be applied to almost any aspect of our lives. Have an assignment to write? Do it in chunks, divide it into researching one day, data collection another, outlining another then a few days to write each section and you will complete it in good time without any stress.

Chunking is exactly how I am able to write books. By just setting aside an hour a day to write 5-6 pages, I am able to write entire books in a few months. Chunking is a powerful habit that can help you complete long term goals.

The prophet (peace be upon him) encouraged us to do extra acts of worship in small quality portions too when he (peace be upon him) said:


عَنْ عَائِشَةَ، أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ ‏ سَدِّدُوا وَقَارِبُوا، وَاعْلَمُوا أَنْ لَنْ يُدْخِلَ أَحَدَكُمْ عَمَلُهُ الْجَنَّةَ، وَأَنَّ أَحَبَّ الأَعْمَالِ أَدْوَمُهَا إِلَى اللَّهِ، وَإِنْ قَلَّ

“Do good deeds properly, sincerely and moderately and know that your deeds will not make you enter Paradise, and that the most beloved deed to Allah’s is the most regular and constant even though it were little,” (Sahih Al-Bukhari)

3. Allocating Time

One reason many of us procrastinate and never accomplish our goals is that we don’t set aside time for each of our goals. It is a very good habit to set aside time for everything important in your life.

Personally, I set time aside every day for my spouse, my children, my writings, reading, studying, reciting Qur’an, home-schooling my children and every aspect of my job. It is only because I have set a specific time for each task that I have been able to get things done.

This is a simple habit to develop. During the planning phase for each goal, work out how much time you need in a day for something, what time of the day is ideal for that task and set that time for that task.

4. Focusing

Focus is a habit, and an important one too. A study of the lives of successful people, past and present, shows that focusing on the task at hand is one of their keys to success. Focus means to be completely into the task at hand and not allowing yourself to be distracted.

This habit requires discipline and certain lifestyle changes like limiting your social media time, but the results are worth it. We are able to get more work done in half an hour with focus than in two hours with distractions.

The beauty of our religion is that we already have the five daily Salah to train us in focus. Yet this is lost on many of us, as we do not pray properly. For many people, the Salah is just a ritual and the heart and soul is not in it. Praying Salah properly is the best way to build focus which can then be transferred to other aspects of our life.

5. Sticking to a schedule

I have met many people who made schedules or To-Do Lists then forgot about them and continued complaining about not having enough time to get things done. Sticking to a schedule is a habit, and like any other habit, it needs to be built by sticking to it until it becomes a part of who you are.

Sticking to a schedule is a habit that every one of us needs to help us utilize our time properly.

This article is an extract from our hit book Getting The Barakah, available as part of our Self-Help Mega Bundle here.


[1] John Perry, The Art of Procrastination, p. 20

[2] Ibn Jawzi, Time Is Valuable, pp. 23-24

Posted by Ismail Kamdar in Time Management
Thinking Beyond Oneself

Thinking Beyond Oneself

We live in an age of hyper-individualism (a tendency for people to act in a highly individual way, without regard to society). Many young people today have grown up in an environment that has made them extremely self-focused. The Self-Help industry has played a major role in making this problem worse. Everything is about your goals, your dreams, and your desires. Many people have reached a dangerous level of self-centeredness. At this point, life has become all about the self. There is no sense of family, community or ummatic concern. The needs and desires of the self override everything else.

Islam, however, calls on us to find balance between fulfilling the rights of the Creator, the rights of the Creation and our own needs and goals. This balance is missing a lot of modern culture. Many young people do not want to get married because they do not want the responsibility of another person. If they do get married, many young people do not want to have children because they see children as a burden and an obstacle in the way of their personal goals. The idea of one’s neighbours, community or the ummah as a whole having rights over oneself has become a foreign idea in the minds of many people.

This problematic paradigm needs to be adjusted. People need to learn how to care about others. The dangers of not doing so is that many people will end up alone, and communities will slowly fall apart. Communities thrive when people care about each other and put the needs of others above their own. To get back to this natural way of living, here are a few necessary steps we can all take.

Embrace Responsibility

Muslims must be responsible and socially conscious people. The rights of others are not a burden, but an opportunity for us to become the best versions of ourselves. It is through taking care of the rights of others that we find fulfilment and true happiness. Responsibility is necessary for growth, and for unlocking better versions for ourselves.

Start small and take up responsibilities around the home and at work. When you are ready, embrace the responsibility of starting a family. As your family grows, so will you. Marriage and becoming a parent are important milestones that shape us and help us grow into better versions of ourselves. So do not delay these important steps unnecessarily. Over time, you will find more joy in fulfilling your family responsibilities then in selfish pursuits.

Learn more about other people and their lives

Too many of us live in silos. We sit all day at home working online, while surfing social media and streaming movies and tv shows. Such people lack real lives and connection with others. This is an unnatural way of life that has made us disconnected from humanity. It is time to break away from these dangerous habits and embrace the real world.

Leave the comfort of your home. Talk to real people. Learn about their challenges, problems, and dreams. Form real friendships and connections with others. This will help you develop more empathy for people and change the way you think about life and your goals. Once you connect deeply with enough people and understand their problems, your own goals may evolve from selfish pursuits to solving societal problems. It is then that you will discover the true joy of contribution. A joy that the selfish person can never understand.

Make time to serve your community. Volunteer to help others. Go out and do what you can for others. Assist your neighbours, join a community development initiative, and get involved in helping others. There is far more joy in service than in being alone. Over time, you will learn to enjoy this more than your personal pursuits.

Study the Quran and Sunnah teachings on this topic

The Quran and Sunnah are full of wisdom on the importance of family, community and ummatic concern. We will end with some quotations from the Quran and Sunnah for you to reflect on. Hopefully, this reflection can inspire true and deep change in all of us.

Quran on Ummah

“You are the best community that ever emerged for humanity: you advocate what is moral, and forbid what is immoral, and believe in God.” (Surah Ale-Imran 3:110)

“And cooperate with one another in virtuous conduct and conscience, and do not cooperate with one another in sin and hostility. And fear God. God is severe in punishment.” (Surah al-Ma’idah 5:2)

“This nation of yours is one nation, and I am your Lord, so fear Me.” (Surah al-Muminun 23:52)

Hadiths on Caring for others

“Seek out the vulnerable for me, for you are only given provision and divine support due to your care for the vulnerable.” (Abu Dawud 2594)

“The parable of the believers in their affection, mercy, and compassion for each other is that of a body. When any limb aches, the whole body reacts with sleeplessness and fever.” (Sahih Bukhari 6011, Sahih Muslim 2586)

“Whoever would love to be shaded in the shade of Allah, let him help someone in hardship or waive a loan.” (Musnad Ahmad 15520)

“Allah continues to fulfill the needs of the servant as long as he fulfills the needs of his brother.” (Mu’jam al-Kabir 4664)

“The merciful will be shown mercy by the Most Merciful. Be merciful to those on the earth, and the One in the heavens will have mercy upon you.” (Tirmidhi 1924)

“Verily, the believers are like bricks of a building, each part strengthening the other,” (Sahih Bukhari 481, Sahih Muslim 2585)

“There is a (compulsory) Sadaqa (charity) to be given for every joint of the human body (as a sign of gratitude to Allah) everyday the sun rises. To judge justly between two persons is regarded as Sadaqa, and to help a man concerning his riding animal by helping him to ride it or by lifting his luggage on to it, is also regarded as Sadaqa, and (saying) a good word is also Sadaqa, and every step taken on one’s way to offer the compulsory prayer (in the mosque) is also Sadaqa and to remove a harmful thing from the way is also Sadaqa.” (Sahih Bukhari 2989)

Hadiths on avoiding jealousy and hatred between believers

“Renounce the world and Allah will love you, and renounce what the people possess and the people will love you.” (Nawawi’s 40 Hadith, 31)

“None of you will have faith till he wishes for his (Muslim) brother what he likes for himself.” (Sahih Bukhari 13)

“Do not envy one another, and do not inflate prices for one another, and do not hate one another, and do not turn away from one another, and do not undercut one another in trade, but [rather] be slaves of Allah and brothers [amongst yourselves]. A Muslim is the brother of a Muslim: he does not oppress him, nor does he fail him, nor does he lie to him, nor does he hold him in contempt. Taqwa (piety) is right here [and he pointed to his chest three times]. It is evil enough for a man to hold his brother Muslim in contempt. The whole of a Muslim is inviolable for another Muslim: his blood, his property, and his honour.” (Sahih Muslim 2564)

Posted by Ismail Kamdar in Leadership, Productivity
NEW COURSE: Islamic Parenting

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  1. Introduction to Islamic Parenting
  2. Considerations before having children
  3. Developmental Phases of Childhood
  4. The Role of Mothers in Parenting
  5. The Role of Fathers in Parenting
  6. The Case for the Stay-At-Home mum
  7. The Case for Homeschooling
  8. Raising Daughters
  9. Raising Sons
  10. Parenting during the Early Years
  11. Designing Your Home Environment
  12. Building Character in Children
  13. Building Resilience in Children
  14. Religious Education Priorities
  15. Raising children for independence
  16. Islamic Sexual Education
  17. Puberty & Accountability
  18. Preparing them for adult life
  19. Cultural Considerations
  20. Navigating Modern Technology
  21. When children go astray
  22. When children grow up

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Posted by Ismail Kamdar in Homeschooling
Reframing the Obstacles in our lives

Reframing the Obstacles in our lives

Anyone who has ever attempted to accomplish an important goal has faced obstacles. It is the way of the world that when you set out to accomplish something big, everything will go wrong, and various speedbumps arise between you and your goal. It may feel like the world is conspiring against you and forcing you to make a choice. At this point, you have two choices: give up or power through. Too many of us choose to give up at the first obstacle, so we never live up to our full potential.

What causes us to give up so easily? It could be a lack of belief in the importance of our goal, or a lack of self-discipline. Maybe it is a desire for instant gratification or being sold a false dream of quick riches. It really could be that we are just lazy and do not want to put in the work needed to accomplish important goals, or that we are weak and unable to manage the trials of life. Whatever the reason, I believe that reframing the problem can help us overcome these obstacles and work our way towards our eventual goals.

Obstacles are really opportunities for growth

Think of your obstacles as opportunities. You wanted to build a successful business overnight, but multiple obstacles are in your way. These are not your enemies. These are simply opportunities to learn how business works, how to excel in your field, and how to solve major problems. The best life lessons are learned on the field when facing challenges and overcoming them.

An important life skill for anyone to develop is problem solving. The obstacles we face in life give us a chance to learn, demonstrate and refine our critical thinking skills. It is through these trials that we grow and evolve into better versions of ourselves. Simply put, without obstacles we will stagnate and never truly upgrade our skillsets.

Obstacles are actually just tests of will power

How willing are you to accomplish your goal? Do you really know yourself and the limits of your will power? Well good news for you, an obstacle is here to assess your will power for you. All you have to do is power through it and you will know that you have more will power than you ever realized before.

Be excited to face the next obstacle. It is a chance to prove to yourself that you have the willpower to beat the odds, overcome any setbacks, and work through every obstacle. Face it head on and take it as a challenge to prove that you are a model of true will power.

Obstacles are, in fact, necessary to accomplish our goals

An obstacle may have popped up because you lack something key to accomplishing your goal. And that key lies in learning from this obstacle and overcoming it. It may be that you need certain knowledge to succeed in life, but you can only gain that knowledge or experience from working through this obstacle. So, the obstacle has popped up at the right time to give you what you need to grow.

Sometimes what seems like an obstacle is, in fact, the way forward. The path you had chosen for yourself was going to lead to ruin or failure, but this obstacle may redirect you to a better path, one that is more likely to succeed. Stop looking at obstacles as signs to give up, start looking at them as part of the process of success.

Obstacles are what make success so much sweeter

When you narrate your success story to your descendants and students many decades from now, which part of the story do you think they will find most interesting? It will not be all those happy smooth days when everything was going your way. No, what they will really be interested in is what obstacles you faced and how you overcame those obstacles. It is that part of the story that makes it gripping and makes the happy ending so much sweeter.

You are living that part of the story right now. The pain, stress, anxiety, and fear you feel as you chase your goals are all part of the process. You too will find the taste of success so much sweeter if you must struggle to get it. Anything that we gain too easily we fail to appreciate. It is the goals we struggled for, and the obstacles that we overcame in the process, which make success so satisfying. Your story is not over yet, you are just in the most exciting chapter. Keep moving forward and finish your story.

Think Positive and reframe your obstacles accordingly.

Life is not meant to be easy. This is especially true if you want to accomplish remarkable things in your life. Let go of the defeatist attitude. Stop with the negative thinking. Prepare yourself to face a variety of challenges on the path to achieving your goals. Success does not come easily, but when it comes, it is so sweet. It was worth all the pain and all the hard work.

Everybody faces obstacles in their lives. But with a positive attitude, strong work ethic, firm trust in Allah, and a never-give-up attitude, you should be able to work through most obstacles and achieve amazing things with your life. If you want to accomplish something big, be ready to work for it, and to face various challenges on the way to accomplishing it. Success never comes easily, and it should not come easily.

Be mindful of Allah, and you will find Him in front of you. Recognize and acknowledge Allah in times of ease and prosperity, and He will remember you in times of adversity. And know that what has passed you by [and you have failed to attain] was not going to befall you, and what has befallen you was not going to pass you by. And know that victory comes with patience, relief with affliction, and hardship with ease.

Nawawi’s 40 Hadith, no: 19
Learn more about overcoming your obstacles and becoming the best version of yourself with this definitive guide to Islamic Masculinity.
Posted by Ismail Kamdar in Goal Setting, Positive Thinking